LEGAL LOLLY POPS FOR LARDY!

The European Union's highest court of stupidity has ruled that obesity is officially a disability; meaning companies will need to provide accommodations for obese workers, such as larger seats and special parking spaces. Only around 0.5 per cent of the population, whither in the U.S. or Europe, have medical reasons for being weightier than a small planet; all the rest of us haven't any excuses if we stuff our faces to the dimension of an earth stopping asteroid. Question for the EU court jesters: Would a mega scale tipper come out of a Gulag?